September is Suicide Prevention Month. I would like to share some of my thoughts. At 51 years old I am doing some reflection on my life. As fall approaches, F. Scott Fitzgerald quotes, “Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.”
I have been working on a book for the last five years about my own detailed personal story entitled “Dancing Through the Shadows.” What started as a memoir has morphed into a long manifesto. I still have a long ways to go. I am in the beginning stages of editing. The ultimate dream is to one day be published. The writing process is rigorous and meticulous. It requires a conscientious amount of sensitivity and vulnerability. Also, the immense volume of work can be towering.
My one and only objective of writing this is to break the stigma of mental illness and mental health issues.
As someone who was diagnosed at the age of 12 with severe mental illness which required inpatient psychiatric care and ongoing outpatient therapy and medication, my mission is to enlighten and educate others as well as provide awareness. Mental illness can be a thief of pride and dignity. Some individuals live in a shrouded veil and disguise themselves in secrecy and shame. I would like to salute the bravery and courage of so many people that suffer relentlessly on and on without end.
It is overdue that our citizens and elected officials within our communities statewide and at national levels bring mental illness to the forefront by offering resources and programs that can help alleviate the pain and suffering of so many marginalized people that struggle with mental illness – those that fall through the cracks or an older generation that brushed it under the rug if a family member showed signs of mental illness or were sent away to a state psychiatric institution and in some cases, never to return home. People under no circumstances talked about it. There was a fear and apprehension also with terror and a sense of foreboding. Families were almost embarrassed and ashamed to have a son, a daughter, a family member or a friend that was struggling with severe mental illness. They were often left to take it upon themselves to find help. Some individuals that suffered with mental illness lived in silence, even in despair, with thoughts of suicidal ideations. The tragedy (is) the forgotten ones who felt the heavy burdensome thoughts in a world where they were misunderstood or faced discrimination and unfairness with the disease that they inherited. There is no cure for people with severe mental illness at this time. It can be managed with medication compliance, therapy, psychiatry and faith. The heartbreaking part is that there are those who feel they were not made for this world and that life has been too unbearable and painful to endure, conveying a level of suffering that is difficult or impossible to tolerate. Life can feel so overwhelming that they believe suicide is the only escape. In the sadness of an impulsive decision they end their lives prematurely, leaving families perplexed and baffled with hopelessness.
The mystery of the missing puzzle piece that would not fit or the riddle no one could solve. I have had my own acutely painful, arduous journey through the brilliant madness of mental illness. As a strong advocate for mental illness and mental health issues, there is hope in a shimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. The fine arts have helped me navigate and find beauty in the perils and uncertainty of life. In dancing through the shadows I have found Christ’s grace. We all need to blend, fuse and unite and find the humanity in everyone. We all need to write and share our stories. To come from behind the curtain. In doing so, we are breaking the stigma of mental illness and mental health.
I would like to share today, if there is anyone out there who is suffering, you are a courageous and lionhearted human being. Keep fighting the good fight daily. Mental illness is like any other medical illness. You didn’t choose it. You don’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. And it certainly wasn’t a decision.
Shane Wilkerson
Mental health resources
WellStone, Cullman, AL – 256-734-4688
Suicide and Crisis Lifeline – Dial or text 988
NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness
800-950-6264 or text “Helpline” to 62640Â
